Forgive me Lord for questioning Your purpose during these fundamentally disordered moments of history. Where are You in all of this that faces me? What have I done wrong that You withhold Your favor? When will this season end? The tumultuous times ordained for my sojourning often perplex my heart with deceiving notions of Your abandonment. Yet, such thoughts are contrary to the implanted Word within my soul. You have promised never to forsake those who belong to You. Let me not join the ranks of the gloomy and morose. Rather, bring to the surface my underlying joy despite the circumstances. Raise up in me a contrary sense of peace which reminds me that this world is not my home. I am inevitably plagued by a longing to return to the perfection of Your Kingdom. Though these troubling questions remain unsettled in my heart, I trust in Your provident grace. Banish the vanity of my life pursuits. Lord, tether my wandering heart with Your Spirit. Your ways are inscrutable to those with Christ-less eyes. Grant me faithful sight so I can gaze in wonder at the majestic hues of love shimmering in the atmosphere of dark history. Only You can ordain purpose for the fundamentally disordered times we live in. I release my need to understand upon the altar of divine love. Under the canopy of truth in Psalm 31:9-10, 14-15 and the authority of Christ I pray.
Be gracious to me, O Lord, for I am in distress;
my eye wastes away from grief,
my soul and body also.
For my life is spent with sorrow,
and my years with sighing;
my strength fails because of my misery,
and my bones waste away.
But I trust in You, O Lord;
I say, “You are my God.”
My times are in Your hand;
deliver me from the hand of my enemies and persecutors.
Psalm 31:9-10, 14-15, NRSV